One of my friends
requested that I write a post about love. Now felt like a good a time as any
for such a post. Admittedly, this post is extremely personal and I have more
than a few misgivings about putting this out for the world to see.
I wish that I could
write about how I was in a wonderful relationship. My first somewhat real relationship
was a whirlwind of emotions but it ended soon after it began. It’s end though
allowed me to appreciate the other kinds of love that I am blessed to be
surrounded by.
These are the wonderful
people around me who have come, in all forms and at all times, to lift me up
during times of doubt, worry, pain or loneliness.
My class loves
potlucks and recently we had another one. Since my kitchen has proved to be a
good location for such gatherings in the past, I volunteered to host it again.
The day of the potluck turned out to be a very emotionally low day for me. I
spent much of it crying and then trying in vain to get something done when I
wasn’t. But then the love began pouring in. Two friends, one who figured out
what was going on and one who I explicitly called because I needed an uplift
came over an hour before to gently chide me and my thoughts away from the train
wreck they were threatening to become. When my classmates arrived, they let me
be a terrible host and started setting things up without forcing me to join
them before I was ready. They welcomed me when I was there and yet gave the
space I wanted. And as they left, several offered to be a listening ear if I
needed one, without asking for any information on what was going on. I wish I
had shown my gratitude then.
I have said before
that Finland has allowed me to create a new identity for myself and everyone
who I have met here has had a part to play in this creation. It is because of
the people I am surrounded by that I have had the courage and motivation to
continue refining myself into a better version of myself. They have offered
encouragement, tough love, and admonished me when I have been unreasonable.
This is not to say
the people at home have not been part of the process. My family, for one, is a
rock that I wouldn’t get very far without. And my friends back at home have
been doing all of these things for a very long time. It took leaving for me to
finally appreciate them.
There may be plenty
of times when darkness creeps in. But I still know that with all the love I get
during those times, I am one of the lucky ones.
Much love to you..
ReplyDelete